We’d spent the day moving, and still weren’t done. Things needed to be unpacked and boxes broken down so the house wasn’t so unsettled. Daddy sat in His office chair surrounded by piles looking frustrated.
He turned His chair to face me as I entered sneezing from the accumulation of dust. “My tank is low,” He said, reaching for me.
I moved to Him, wrapping my arms around His shoulders as He pressed His face to my breasts, sighing.
In past relationships, I couldn’t have suddenly announced a low love tank. I wouldn’t have understood that was the problem, and I wouldn’t have had the communication foundation built with my partners to express it.
I remember drowning in unhappiness, knowing I didn’t feel loved but with no idea how to communicate that concept. I’ve had partners who I know felt the same way.
This relationship is different. Because we both actively feed each other’s needs, the fire burns as hot as it did when we began. Any diminished glow is a noticeable difference from regular operations. Armed with the knowlege of how *full* feels, it is much easier to pause and tell each other we need more touch, more time together.
Sometimes life gets in the way. Moving, holidays, family emergencies, arguments: these things can drain the tanks fast. Refilling them takes specific and intentional effort. Sometimes that means taking a day just for us, or a day with family. It might mean a surprise date night, holding hands at a movie and dinner just to make googly eyes at each other and the hot waitress over declicious sushi. It might be me asking for impact because it has been a while, beatin’ toys boxed up for too long.
For us, the important part is that we can communicate those needs to one another and it becomes a priority for us to remedy the issue. It helps us both to know this matters enough to set aside the other things and focus on each other.
So we took a day off from the world together. We ate bacon and eggs, had an impromptu visit, played board games with Apples and spouses, ate designer cupcakes, and laughed. I cooked something I’ve never made Him before, and we watched Remember the Titans, but just until right before the car accident because I always cry extra at that part, and that movie already has enough feels for me.
Sometimes those things are what we both need.